Depression After Breakups: Symptoms, Treatments, and Tips

Let’s be real: Breakups can be brutal. If you’re here, you’ve likely felt this kind of emotional pain firsthand.

It can be reassuring to know you’re not alone — for instance, as many as 66.6 percent of university relationships end in a breakup. But statistics don’t diminish your heartbreak; it’s a form of grief.

Breakups bring all sorts of significant changes, shaking your sense of self and plans. These upheavals can leave you feeling distressed, anxious, and sad. While feelings of sadness are normal after a breakup, they can sometimes linger or worsen over time, potentially leading to depression.

This, too, is common. In 2021, 8.3 percent of U.S. adults experienced depression. Yet there’s hope. Depression, whether due to the end of a relationship or otherwise, is treatable. Things can get better.

Ahead, we’ll outline common symptoms of depression, distinguish them from breakup sadness, explore coping strategies, and share effective treatment options to help you recover from a broken heart and feel like yourself again.

Like depression in general, post-breakup depression can manifest in both physical and emotional symptoms.

Some signs of depression include:

• Feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness, and guilt

• Emotional distress

• Feeling empty, irritable, frustrated, or restless

• Changes in appetite and physical gastrointestinal symptoms

• Difficulty concentrating and indecision

• Headaches, cramps, and other physical pains

• Loss of interest or pleasure in activities you usually enjoy

These symptoms can come up right after the breakup, but they can also take longer to set in. Sometimes, it takes days, weeks, or even longer for you to feel depression symptoms after a triggering event, like a breakup.

There are several types of depression, ranging from major depressive disorder (MDD) to seasonal affective disorder (SAD) and premenstrual dysphoric disorder (PMDD).

Stressful life events can also lead to clinical depression, which is sometimes called situational depression or reactive depression. A breakup can fit in this category due to its potential for significant life changes that might leave you feeling betrayed or depressed and disrupt your identity and daily life.

Have we mentioned that breakups are hard?

There’s also something neurological going on when relationships end.

Research suggests that chemical reactions occur throughout various stages of relationships, from lust and attraction to attachment to, unfortunately, rejection or separation. Sex hormones like testosterone and estrogen play crucial roles during this process, alongside dopamine (a “feel good” chemical) and norepinephrine and cortisol, which are “stress” hormones. Oxytocin promotes feelings of closeness, connection, and intimacy.

Consider the rush of excitement after a great date or the calm of hearing "I love you" — these feelings are partly driven by brain chemistry. When a relationship ends, dopamine and serotonin levels often drop. Both of these neurotransmitters are linked with pleasure and well-being, so reduced levels can contribute to depression.

Brain scans in a small study on people going through breakups revealed that romantic rejection could even resemble addiction, triggering symptoms like cravings, withdrawals, and depression. That might help explain some of the intense feelings associated with breakups.

Risk Factors for Depression After a Breakup

Most people experience an adjustment period after a breakup, but the difficulty of this time can vary depending on individual risk factors.

Some risk factors for depression after a breakup can include:

• Adjustment disorder, which causes difficulty regulating emotional reactions to changes and stressors to the point that it impacts daily functioning

• A history of depression or anxiety

• Low self-esteem

• Multiple negative life events happening at once

• Traumatic endings, like an unexpected breakup or infidelity

In sum, a romantic relationship breakup can indeed trigger depression.

As we've pointed out, feeling sad or empty after breakups is very common, as is emotional dysregulation, like mood swings.

But distinguishing between normal post-breakup feelings and a more serious mental health condition like depression can be challenging.

A key difference is that depression involves persistent, constant, and pervasive feelings of worthlessness, sadness, and hopelessness. In contrast, post-breakup blues tend to fluctuate and may not dominate every moment.

To be diagnosed with depression, you must have symptoms that significantly impact your daily functioning for at least two weeks.

No matter what your diagnosis may be, it's essential to seek professional help promptly if feelings of hopelessness, severe fatigue, or thoughts of self-harm bubble up.

If your feelings don’t seem to get better over time, or they’re making it difficult to function in daily life, it may be time to seek professional help.

Depending on your symptoms, you may consider both therapy and medication options. We’ll break down both treatment types below.

Consider Doing Therapy

There are a few different types of therapy for depression. The ones below may be worth considering for breakups:

• Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT). Research shows that cognitive-behavioral therapy can effectively treat depression. CBT helps people identify unhealthy and negative thought patterns that fuel harmful behaviors and find ways to change them. The goal is to teach people coping skills to help them better manage their symptoms and navigate future stressors like breakups and dating.

• Interpersonal therapy (ITP). As a form of talk therapy specifically designed to address mood disorders and improve relationships, interpersonal therapy can be a great tool for someone with depression after a breakup. Some research also suggests that IPT effectively treats depression generally.

Find Out If Medication Is Necessary

While therapy can be a great way to start rebuilding self-esteem and recovering from a breakup, healthcare providers and mental health professionals may also recommend medication.

Antidepressants are sometimes used as a supplement to one of the therapies described above. Some options include:

• Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs). SSRIs are some of the most common types of antidepressants prescribed to treat depression. They work by increasing serotonin in the brain. Some examples are Lexapro® (escitalopram), Paxil® (paroxetine), and Zoloft® (sertraline).

• Serotonin-norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors (SNRIs). These work similarly to SSRIs, but they target norepinephrine — a stress chemical in the body — and serotonin. Common SNRIs include Effexor® (venlafaxine) and Cymbalta® (duloxetine).

• Atypical antidepressants. Wellbutrin® (bupropion), which is often referred to as an atypical antidepressant, belongs to a class of antidepressants called norepinephrine-dopamine reuptake inhibitors (NDRIs). It targets the symptoms of depression by increasing the amount of norepinephrine and dopamine — which help regulate mood, cognitive function, and behavior — in the brain.

Even though all of the above treatments can help, it’s also important to incorporate healthy habits into your daily life while dealing with heartbreak. Practicing self-care can look different for everyone, but here are some ideas:

• Reach out to loved ones. Having a support system can do wonders as you recover. If you don’t feel comfortable reaching out to anyone in your circle, consider joining a support group.

• Use social media wisely. It may be best to avoid social media, especially if it previously led to self-esteem issues. Your well-being is likely more fragile right now, so limit your scroll time if you tend to compare yourself to others or if you run the risk of seeing your ex on your feed. Speaking of which…

• Set boundaries. One study showed that seeing your ex on social media can make the recovery process more complicated. Though algorithms play a significant role, you can unfollow your ex, limit their ability to view your content, or block them. You could even consider the (sometimes controversial) no-contact rule.

• Stay active. Exercising is a great way to take your mind off of a breakup, especially if you take your workout outdoors. Studies show that your brain releases endorphins — a hormone that boosts mood and reduces pain — when you exercise, and nature can add a calming boost.

• Eat whole foods. Eating a healthy diet of lean protein (like fish and chicken), fruits, veggies, and whole grains can help you feel more energized. Some healthy foods might even help fight depression.

• Practice patience. You may be wondering, how long does breakup depression last? While there’s no definitive answer, seeking treatment and doing little things to boost self-esteem will kickstart your healing process. It takes time, and part of the process is just letting yourself grieve. But it can get better. One study found that breakups can yield positive outcomes, including self-discovery and emotional growth.

Breakups are rarely easy. Dealing with feelings of rejection and sadness can be emotionally painful, and sometimes breakups can trigger depression. Here’s what to keep in mind about post-breakup depression:

• When a relationship ends, you might experience a drop in dopamine and serotonin. Both chemicals are involved in mood regulation, and lower levels can be associated with depression.

• Some symptoms of depression include emotional distress, feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness, and guilt, and loss of interest or pleasure in activities you usually enjoy.

• Post-breakup sadness can look similar to depression. However, someone must display the symptoms consistently for a minimum of two weeks to receive a diagnosis of clinical depression.

• If you relate to the above, it might be time to seek professional help for depression. There are a few treatments for depression, including talk therapies like CBT and ITP, as well as antidepressants such as SSRIs and SNRIs.

• Whether you’re feeling sad or you think you may have depression, it’s important that you take care of yourself during this moment of upset. Staying active, using social media wisely, and leaning on loved ones can all be acts of self-care.

When you’re in the thick of a breakup, it can be tough to see that things will get better. But you’ve already taken the first step by getting informed about depression after breakups. We see you and are here to support your journey toward healing.

If you think you might be depressed and you’re ready to take another step, you can schedule an online consultation with a healthcare professional to go over options that might help you recover.